Four Arms, Four Legs, and Two Heads, oh my!

In Plato's Symposium, Aristophanes presented a story about soulmates. It states that humans originally consisted of four arms, four legs, and a single head made of two faces. Zeus feared their power and split them all in half, condemning them to spend their lives searching for the other half to complete them.

Although it's an old story it has the potential of being a dangerous way to look at life and love, whether you are single or in a relationship. Those who are single are doomed to feel as though they need to walk around looking for their other half, feeling as though they are not complete without their counterpart. This creates an air of desperation and puts too much pressure on every encounter. It is equally as detrimental to those who are in a relationship because they may feel that their significant other completes them and in turn they rely on them for their happiness. Either way, the individual is putting their happiness in the wrong hands.These people, to whatever degree, are looking outward for the source of their happiness when truly the key lies within yourself.

Loving yourself is a prerequisite for creating a successful and authentic bond with another.The relationship you have with yourself is the most central relationship in your life. It is at the center of all  elements that make up your life - family, friends, love relationships, work. At its core, loving yourself simply means believing in your own essential worthiness. It means looking inward toward your own wants and needs, then honoring them in the exact same way you want your partner to.

Not everyone grows up to have a natural sense of self-esteem or worth. In fact, most of us need to work at it to some degree throughout our lives. Each person feels inadequate in one or more areas, whether physical, intellectual, financial, or in interpersonal dynamics, emotional maturity, or spiritual growth. However, respecting, nurturing, honoring, and cherishing yourself is something that anyone can learn. Only when you have successfully mastered taking care of your own needs can you know how to extend that same attention to others. When you believe how valuable you are, you can then give authentic affection to a partner.

So love yourself, and the rest will fall into place. You can only cultivate as much love as you create a capacity for within yourself.